{"id":1304,"date":"2016-03-22T21:59:09","date_gmt":"2016-03-22T21:59:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lifereader.co.uk\/articles\/?p=1304"},"modified":"2016-03-22T21:59:09","modified_gmt":"2016-03-22T21:59:09","slug":"exes-moving-on-pain-free","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lifereader.co.uk\/articles\/exes-moving-on-pain-free\/","title":{"rendered":"Exes: Moving on Pain Free"},"content":{"rendered":"

It was destined. Meant to be. You decided you were soul mates, twin flames, everything. He had a nice car, a good job, no dirt under his fingernails and his mother adored you. You rented a place, bought an iguana, and planned a vacation for the following year. All that was left to do was sit tight, and wait for the rock.<\/p>\n

So. What went wrong?
\nSometimes relationships which seem perfect break down. I speak to many people who are having trouble accepting that a relationship is over. It\u2019s a bitter pill to swallow, because what we tend to do is blame ourselves when relationships deteriorate. We ask questions like, \u201cWhy me? Why was I so easy to cast aside?\u201d or, \u201cWhat could I have done to prevent this?\u201d<\/p>\n

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Some begin single life feeling angry and resentful, then there are the hopeless romantics and randy rebounders who, despite their pain, rush into new relationships without giving their wounds time to heal.<\/p>\n

The word \u2018closure\u2019 is a big word in our love culture, but how can you really achieve it? Is closure your ex\u2019s responsibility, the universe\u2019s responsibility? Or, is it something which you can cultivate within yourself? Why wait for it? And, what if it never comes anyway? What can you do?<\/p>\n

The answer is simple. You can find real closure by replacing the need for it with something far more powerful \u2013 ACCEPTANCE. By choosing to accept the things you can\u2019t change, you can begin to heal and lay stronger foundations for your future. Assign no blame to either you or your ex. If you still feel resentment, guilt or anger, there\u2019s an effective remedy for this, too \u2013 FORGIVENESS. Forgive your ex. If you did wrong, forgive yourself. You are both beautiful, divine creations, but you are not infallible. You are human beings, and naturally you will make mistakes.<\/p>\n

Life happens because you make choices. When you empower yourself by making the choice to accept the past and forgive yourself, your ex, his mother, the iguana, you instantly begin to heal. The compassion that forgiveness and acceptance generate from your heart chakra heals emotional wounds. Let go of fears, worries and doubts rooted deep in the past, because they only serve to hold you back.<\/p>\n

When you merge with someone romantically, certain chakras connect in the most intimate way. However, when a relationship ends and both parties go their separate ways, sometimes the connections we make through the energy field, or aura, are not broken. This can result in obsessive thoughts and feelings about an ex, and an inability to contemplate any future happiness without them.<\/p>\n

Ironically, this obsession only serves to weaken the individual, and many end up miserable because they can\u2019t seem to let go. Relationships end for all kinds of reasons, and also for one overall reason \u2013 you were no longer compatible. That\u2019s it. The changes which occurred made it impossible for you to continue, and that\u2019s ok. Single isn\u2019t a dirty word. In fact, choosing to remain single can be one of the most empowering things you can do for yourself. I always advise some time spent alone to recoup after a relationship ends.<\/p>\n