By Claudia: At the “dawn” of my lunar return, I’m sitting here in my studio celebrating with Haakon (I call him H), my spirit guide. H is a 7 foot blonde man last incarnated in the 13th Century as a Viking, he was an explorer of new lands and “dealt” with NEW (American Indians) populations to help his people feed themselves and have an actual prospect of a safe life. I often ask him if he really thought it was a good idea to stop incarnating after a life spent as a Viking and explorer which for sure had his “less than holy” moments, I mean… months and months at sea without any real prospects and the never-ending battle for food and territory is not exactly ground to elevate a soul to the peacefully unlimited knowledge required to permanently abandoning the physical form. Yet, every time he just smiles, pulls his blonde flocks behind his ears and says “I loved my woman, forgave my mother and died for my best friend”.
At that, the only comment that comes to my clearly overpowered human mind is “Was your mother that difficult?” and he said ” The Ocean can be difficult to forgive”. Now I’m right down confused, so I reply a simple “Ocean?” His smile gives way to a very human veil of melancholy “Yes, because it takes away a lot more than things that can sink, it robs you of time, steals your name, breaks your body and deals your mind as a ferocious bear… at the end, it leaves you with nothing but your capacity to forgive”.
Wow, OK… and I thought I had a bad day…I try to make it all a little bit lighthearted, in the end, today is my Lunar Return, the kind of birthday he specifically likes because he used to celebrate it every month with his loved ones…and moreover, although he came into my life over 20 years ago and most of the times we treat each other as “that annoying siblings you just can’t get rid of” (I drive him mad because to him I’m just too reckless, quick and curious and never give him any peace, and he drives me up the wall when at a specific question about something very practical and very immediate I get an answer that can go on for days given that he always stars at the “very beginning”) I’m in awe of him…truth is that I don’t even know why he chose me, maybe after all he did still have some karma to balance out….
He seems all jolly again, he knows me better than “anyone” else, so he understands how his moods can affect an empath and psychic like me…so we get back into talking about my Lunar return and joke around what the next month has in the pipeline for me. He knows that Astrology is my “safe zone”, after spending the majority of my life studying it and understanding it’s laws, it has become my very safety blanket, a place where everything makes sense, especially what to many appears to be completely irrational. But tonight I want more than safety…Tonight I’m willing to listen to an endless story, it’s my new moon and as I sit bare and innocent as a child, I ask my question, of course I don’t even have to utter a sound. He kneels in front of me with his piercing blue eyes lit of gratitude and cosmic love. “Would you really like to know the story of Twin Flames?”
H “Our most prized possession is our memory, and I don’t mean the capacity to remember facts but the ability to remember ourselves. When we come back to a single form, we immediately start getting knocked about from right, left and centre, to the point that we experience panic for the first time and learn how to avoid it or at least minimize it. We learn to call it “fitting in” and “working along with others”. We start learning how to cope with this baggage of emotions and painful limitations, you see? Limitations are like viral diseases, its very concept spreads across humans faster than the plague and feeds off the fear we nurture towards our own very emotions… it’s the apocalypse of downwards cycles. We condemn the emotions that we were given in order to grow into that process of rejection that makes us feel limited and therefore scared; so we cling to the information we get fed and forget the actual reality: The one where we are limitless stellar entities of knowledge for whom “love” is not a function, but …an element.”
Ok, now I’m gently beginning to understand…. “H” is gearing up for one good story, my automatic reaction is to reach out for my laptop and re-check the current Venus position against my natal 5th natal chart…but to what use… I know the transits by heart already, and besides… let’s not interrupt the teacher….
H “When you meet someone and you feel like you’ve just been embraced by an angel, when you can lose yourself in him and would be happy to watch the world burn around you for nothing can touch you, when you no longer feel the needs of your body, no thirst, no hunger and no tiredness for all you need to be fed, satisfied and awaken is a simple thought, a look, an embrace that defies all the rules you followed your entire life. That’s what happens when you meet your twin flame, and by the time you can’t even feel gravity you know you’ve both recognized one another.”
“It’s beautiful, but what’s with the intro about our memory?” I ask and then immediately regret it…. I’m behaving like a rascal even for my standards, luckily “H” has already seen me doing a lot worse.
H ” It’s ok, it’s your state of necessity, you need to keep moving in order to know you’re still here, sometimes, Claudia , I wonder how can a such powerful being as you, co exist with such an unforgiving frailty”
“Helping my fellow singled form Humans” I reply almost annoyed… “And the occasional wine”
H “Wine is for limpy dxxxx and Romans”
“I am a straight descendant of the Romans!”
H “I know, hence I’m yours. Sometimes cosmic knowledge comes with a phenomenal sense of humor. Back to your question, what does have memory do with it? Everything….
I can’t help myself….” I’m doing my best here buddy, but you need to start tie things up….or I’ll end up like your last best friend whom you died for and no-one knows what happened to him…” I hated myself for being sarcastic but I was running out of oxygen…
H “His name was TanHkuly. He was a chief of the tribe that lived in what now bears the name of Long Island, best man I’ve ever known, and his memory is the reason why we are having this conversation. Memory is everything, and all we’re ready to give up. Call it “protection of the masses” many of us couldn’t cope if they remembered everything. Yet again we leave traces of our consciousness into the fabric of the universe like a child would leave bread crumbs on a mountain trail and it is our twin flame’s job to follow them. Let me tell you how…
TO BE CONTINUED….
Love and Light,